I spend a lot of time saving my own life. It is easy to fall into a trap and waste a lot of precious time, so I work on it every day.
I have chosen to invest my time into the things that not only save me time and money but also save my energy so I can experience the best that life has to offer me now.
I practice saving precious life-time for the good stuff.
What is the good stuff? Back in the day, I didn’t have a clue. For many years I reacted to life. I wouldn’t have liked to admit it, but I was at the mercy of others. I took everything to heart and overthought every interaction. I was always defensive, generally anxious, and easily wounded. Life was a battleground. I didn’t live it. It lived me.
A person can survive this way. I am living proof. However, being constantly vigilant… cycling between threat assessment and fight/or flight is no way to thrive.
As loss after loss and wound after wound began to pile up like cordwood, I realized that if I didn’t do something about what was happening, that I would always stay in survivor mode. I would always be somebody’s victim.
That wasn’t good enough for me. That hateful story sucked. I wanted to be able to tell the story of a life designed to thrive, not merely survive, but I didn’t know how.
I wanted, with all my heart, to know better. Somehow, deep inside, I knew that thriving truly is the ultimate survival.
Like a drowning person searching for a life preserver, I began looking for answers. I explored places I wouldn’t normally have looked, listening to people who didn’t think like me or live like me, and in many cases, didn’t look like me. It was an uncomfortable process that required many years of research and self-inquiry to clarify, but what I found there was worth the price of admission and is truly worth sharing.
Anyone with the ability to think, speak, and act can do this work.
My first step was to establish my prime motivators. We may not be able to articulate them at this time, but every human being has them. These are the main drivers of our actions. They either feed or starve our energy levels.
This meant getting back to the basics and identifying my essential motivational drivers, the reasons why I do what I do when I do it.
As it turns out, my prime motivators are creativity, connection, and community.
What Are Your Prime Motivators?
What gets you so excited about a project that you cannot wait to begin it?
And cannot wait to work on it?
Why do you want to do this thing so badly?
What is the payoff for doing what you do?
What deep urge in you does it satisfy?
Deep down, what truly matters?
You may find that much of what you value has been instilled by your family or culture. This is your opportunity to clarify what you value as an individual.
Values are not objectives, they are active, best life practices.
Your values keep you on your path and become the basis for your personal standard of excellence. What you value determines your motivation.
The key to this exercise is to not measure what you value by whether it is “right” or “wrong” but to determine how each of these values works with your vision for your best life.
If you were to share the things that inspire, energize and give you a sense of a job well done, what would they be?
Consider the list below. Circle as many as are applicable to you. Add your own. This is your longlist.
Take your time and create a shortlist. Give your shortlist a lot of consideration as if you needed your 3 prime motivators in order to claim a fantastic gift! This information offers you the gift of clarity, of knowing yourself better. It is a gift that keeps on giving.
1. What do you value?
Authenticity Achievement Autonomy Adventure Balance
Courage Compassion Challenge Connection Community
Contribution Commitment Creativity Curiosity Citizenship
Competency Consistency Dependability Discipline Diligence
Determination Efficiency Effectiveness Education Elegance
Fairness Fitness Faith Fame Fun
Friendship Good humor Growth Grit Happiness
Honesty Health Influence Integrity Innovation
Ingenuity Justice Kindness Knowledge Loyalty
Leadership Learning Love Motivation Mentorship
Openness Optimism Peace Popularity Passion
Perseverance Positivity Reliability Recognition Religion
Reputation Respect Responsibility Tenacity Spirit
Security Service Spirituality Self-respect Stability
Success Status Trustworthiness Wealth Wisdom
2. Create your longlist. I suggest writing them on a separate piece of paper. The act of writing them out helps you to get your thoughts in order. Although many of the values listed above may apply, I suggest keeping this list to 20 items.
3. Create your shortlist:
4. Check your shortlist and group similar values together. Our values often fall into the following 7 categories. These may be helpful as you choose your top 3.
Social Family Personal Development Financial
Career Physical Spiritual
5. My Prime Motivators:
I am a fan of the work of entrepreneur Tom Bilyeu. His podcasts, Impact Theory and Health Theory are truly worthy of your precious time. In the recent Mindvalley talk below, Tom offers us a dazzling masterclass on how to invite others to listen, incite them to embrace change, and inspire them to action! In a masterful demonstration of excellence in motivating others as well as public speaking, Tom cusses a couple of times, but that’s Tom and they fit.
Without a doubt, this man knows what drives him and uses this understanding to his best advantage. Consider, as you watch this, how Tom’s prime motivators have been the genesis of his off-the-chart success.